Wednesday, January 28, 2004
The other day I went for a walk. It was purely magical. I went down the old road (a.k.a. Lovers Lane, Muggers Lane or Ye Olde Road). It had been very cold, and rainy too. As a result all the trees were enveloped with ice. It was still fairly early in the morning and the sun was just coming up, shining through the rising mist. All of this was beautiful, but it was not this beauty that struck me. What struck me were the spider webs. Perfect spider webs shimmering in the morning dew everywhere I looked. Not just one or two of them either. I counted at least fourteen, and that was before I reached the first bend in the road. And not a spider in sight. (That is how it should always be). Anyways, I have no great insight to share because of my experience. It was just exquisite and I wish you all could have seen it.
I was thinking today. Imagine that. I’ve spent a majority of my time avoiding becoming those things that I didn’t want to become. Like how I didn’t want to be a Christian who went to Bible school. And then how I didn’t want to be a student who dated while at “bridal college.” And how I didn’t want to be a bible school girl who married a pastor (God forbid!). And how I didn’t want to be a classic Pentecostal who spoke in tongues all the time. And how I didn’t want to be a student who stayed up all night doing papers or studying for exams. And how I didn’t want to be a third or fourth year who couldn’t relate to freshmen. And how I didn’t want to be girly the way most girls are. And…and…and! Now, all of these things are not bad! In fact, many of them are me. But I just realized that I have spent so much time devoting myself to “not” being a certain way. I haven’t, however, put much time or effort into becoming what I want to be. I don’t even know who that is.
So that’s a little bit where I am at.
Apparently I laugh in my sleep sometimes. Moey mentioned this to me in the summer when we shared a room. I thought it must have just been a one-time occurrence because no one has ever told me that before. But my roommate tells me that the other night I laughed sporadically throughout the night – not just once but a couple of times. I find this quite amusing. Laughing in your sleep is way more entertaining that just talking. What was I laughing about? It must have been something pleasant.
And my eyes are green! For those of you who claim to believe otherwise, you are wrong. I have it from reliable sources that my eyes are in fact green…well, maybe greenish-blue and that’s why they sometimes seem blue. But they are more green than blue. Just to make sure you all know.
Tomorrow is Holly's birthday!
(I think I must just save up all my blogging and do it all at once. Well, I am tired and sick and am now going to bed. Goodnight.)