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Thursday, April 28, 2005

Done and done! 


I feel both supremely invincible and utterly defeated at this very moment, having just completed my last assignment for school. I have really struggled through this last month, and am thankful for the friends I've had around me. Ultimately, I have failed in many ways, failed to be a good friend, a good brother, a good man. But as Paul writes of how terrible a person he is, he concludes with this: "What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death?" This is, of course, a rhetorical question.

Though I am quite happy that I have finished something of such great importance, I am also quite sad. I regret not getting to know many people who I could have; I regret much of the time I have wasted (though not all of it was wasted, I guess); I regret losing friends through conflict or inattention; I regret rejecting grace when it was offered, and expecting grace when it was not. I am sad that, in two days, many of the people I care most about will be moving away, and there isn't time to say proper goodbyes. If I have left anything undone or unsaid, I am sorry.

But this is also a time to rejoice. We have come through a great trial, and though not unscathed, we are still in one piece, thanks to Dad. Well, lyrics, finish us off.


"Loving you
Isn't the right thing to do
How can I ever change things
That I feel
If I could
Maybe I'd give you my world
How can I
When you won't take it from me"

"You can go your own way
Go your own way
You can call it
Another lonely day"

Monday, April 25, 2005


Dude, I'd love to sit in on a Michael Szuk class.
I've been realizing lately that continuity is actually relatively important to me.
My church has no continuity from one service to the next.
I never thought that would bother me.
But it does.

Now go finish your freakin homework!
Don't make me come out there.
Until Thursday.

PS: Everyone who thinks cellphones should be banned from public libraries, just say Aye. I think I'm going to start a petition.

Sunday, April 24, 2005

Look Ma, no socks! 


Today, I realized something of grave importance. CHURCH IS GOOD FOR YOU. I got up, went to Michael Szuk's bible class on James, attended an evangelical liturgical service, and overall had a great time. Szuk's class, as usually, was so practical. All the old people (which was just about everybody but me, and Szuk decided to point that out at the beginning of the class) knew the Bible so well, and it was very informative and encouraging.

The service was also great. I've always enjoyed the more liturgical services; Pentecostal services, though 'exciting,' don't seem to offer much community or participation. I feel like I've received a second wind. With so much fighting and other crap that has been going on in my life these last few weeks, and with papers and exams piling up because I've been too depressed to work on them, today seems like heaven. I only hope it lasts, that I'm not deceiving myself into some false sense of security and happiness.

However, my feet are cold, so I'm going to put some socks on. I tried really hard today, but it's time to give in.


"There was a little boy once upon a time
Who in spite of his young age and small size knew his mind
For every copper penny and clover he would find
Make a wish for better days the end of hard times"

"For no more cold feet
Cold cold cold cold feet"

Saturday, April 23, 2005

Ode To Omar 


Omar
I did not know you as well as i might have hoped...
but i loved you
so sweet and and so cuddly
you shed fur all over, but it wasn't your fault
you were so big, big like your brother Margaret,
and that only made you better for hugging
I shed a tear for you...i will miss kissing your fuzzy little face

Omar: a wonderful cat who will be fondly remembered by those that knew him

A Bad Dream 


I had a dream where all sorts of good things happened. I can barely remember them now, but I know that everyone was happy. That's a good dream, right? Is it still a good dream if you wake up and it's not true?


"Get in touch with that sundown fellow
As he tiptoes across the sand
He’s got a million kinds of stardust
Pick you fav’rite brand, and"

"Dream, when you’re feeling blue
Dream, that’s the thing to do
Just watch the smoke rings rise in the air
You’ll find your share of memories there"

"So dream when the day is through
Dream, and they might come true
Things never are as bad as they seem
So dream, dream, dream"

Thursday, April 21, 2005

Goodbye 


Well, I have two goodbyes to make. One, to that little cavity in my molar. And I say, good riddance!

Number two, goodbye to Omar, my cat. He had to be put down the other day. I was never really 'close' to my cats, but it's still sad.


"It's time to say goodbye
Block out the sun and pack up the sky
Don't let my tears start to make you cry
Each time I try to say my goodbye
Try to stop asking why, why
Try to say my goodbye"

"Oh where are you now?
Could I get there somehow?"

Tuesday, April 19, 2005

Fever Pitch 


I knew something was up; I was quite confused for a moment there. When Donkers told me he went to see Fever Pitch, I said, "Oh, that's the soccer movie, right?" He was quick to correct me: "No, baseball." And for a couple of days now, I've been trying (without looking into the issue, which would have been the smart idea) to reconcile my memory of a Nick Hornby novel/movie about soccer(well not really about soccer) and a new movie about baseball.

Well, apparently they are both the same movie. One is British and about soccer, the other is American and about baseball. Now, it's one thing to make, say, High Fidelity into an American movie; that's a choice they made to begin with. But to remake a movie only 7 years after originally released, it just seems like a hack (even though Hornby himself was onboard). It felt stupid enough when 'The Italian Job' (which doesn't take place in Italy) was Americanized, though it was decades later. Fine, okay, no one today has seen the original, so make a new one, and since we're American, let's make an American film. Fine. But 7 years! The other movie is still modern, it's still relatively new. We don't go around calling "Titanic" an old classic, do we?

Now I'm sure the new movie is good and all. The author is onboard for the project, so it can't be all that bad. I like baseball, and am neither here nor there on the actors. This is not a commentary on the new movie itself, but just the idea thousands upon thousands of people are going to sucked into a movie theatre to see a rehash of a recent movie. Maybe this is why sequels usually do so poorly (or at least aren't very good movies).


"I think I'll go home and mull this over
Before I cram it down my throat
At long last it's crashed, the colossal mass
Has broken up into bits in my moat."

"All these squawking birds won't quit.
Building nothing, laying bricks."

Sunday, April 17, 2005


Call me.


Dude, talking about situations helps.
Seriously.
Let's talk about it.
Your friends can't help unless they know what's going on in your head.
Seriously.

Sunday, April 10, 2005

If you don't like 'em, don't use 'em. 


The world is going crazy from in here, trapped inside these glass cages. I am quite literally about to fall apart. If I were Kup, I would look up at Hot Rod and say, "Fix me." And he would do it too, right after killing all the damned robot piranahs and octopuses that were swarming around. Man, I wish I had a circular saw for a hand.

My room is clean, for now. I just hope the demon doesn't come back with seven friends and party it up in here. What a mess that would make! The first guy used to be on the phone all the frigging time; I kept missing it when my Dad called. Sharing with one guy is bad enough, but sharing with eight, with all of them making crank calls and giving me phoney messages: that's ridiculous!

The nursery isn't really fit for children. I mean, sure, there are some kiddie posters on the wall (A, B, C, 1, 2, and 3), but I don't think tiny toddlers need drums. The view is great and all, but you can't hear nothing. It's like trying to talk on a cellphone with only one bar; every fifth word just can't be heard.

If you could have anyone's job, who's would you take? I would take St. George of Merrie England's job. Man he had it all: the girl, the dragon ass-kicking abilities, three Muslim countries to reign as king. What more could you ask for?

I found some old pictures the other day. There are several of me with various hot chicks, who all appear to rather fond of me. Where are they now? I also found a picture of four half-naked guys with (worshipping?) a moth, and another picture of the back of a fully naked guy. Who from first year could that be?

Up to this point, I have yet to miss a single class this semester. This is a feat I have never completed, and my recollection goes all the way back to Kindergarten. I have definitely missed class time in every year, K-12, and all five college years, except this semester. But, alas, though under two weeks remain, the sickness is getting me. It seems that I have swallowed some steel wool, and the side-effects have been rather unpleasant, to say the least. To say the least....

I need to build one. I can't put them all away if I don't build one. Buying is out of the question. No challenge there. I'd rather build a crappy one then buy a crappy one. And that's all I can afford: crappy. Now all's I need is a hammer. "If I had a hammer...."

Sugar is water soluble, rollerblading uphill is harder but safer than downhill, and I have at least 900 stir sticks on my desk. I've never owned a tie clip before; maybe I should buy one. Or build one. No wait, I've got it! I'll just look inside the peanut butter jar (you know, the one being guarding by the evil Vizier Jafar) and see what I find: a shoe horn, a watch I bought in Thailand, chapstick, a jacket thingy (with compass), a broken zippo. Strange, but there's no peanut butter in this jar. Wait! A tie clip! Now how did that get there? No, seriously, I've never seen it before in my life. I'm not crazy. what would make you think I was crazy?


"Crazy, crazy for feeling so lonely
I'm crazy, crazy for feeling so blue
I know, you´d love me as long as you wanted
and then someday you would leave me for somebody new
Worry, why do I let myself worry?
Wondering, what in the world did I do?"

"Crazy, of thinking that my love could hold you
Oh I'm crazy for tryin´ and crazy for cryin´
And I'm crazy for loving you"

Thursday, April 07, 2005

Oh, so the title field is still here, eh? 


Maybe I was a little harsh before. I have no right to presume upon the salvation of others; though I attempted to separate their use of the Christological title from the necessity of soteriological reality. I stand by what I said afterwards, but the secret things belong to God.

Tirra lirra lirra loo.

Wednesday, April 06, 2005


Andrew, I may have a poor memory of my friends' significant dates, but I don't think your birthday is in April. Unless perhaps you are referring to your spiritual birthday?

Tuesday, April 05, 2005


HAPPY BIRTHDAY ANDREW!


"Some day, when I'm awfully low,
When the world is cold,
I will feel a glow just thinking of you...
And the way you look tonight.

Yes you're lovely, with your smile so warm
And your cheeks so soft,
There is nothing for me but to love you,
And the way you look tonight."

"Mm, Mm, Mm, Mm,
Just the way you look tonight."

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